Should We Always Show Appreciation To Others ?
The most logical and simplest answer to this question would be.....YES, Always !
However in real life it is not as simple as that !
For some people it might be easy to show gratitude and appreciation towards other people. While for the other half of the people this personality traits/skill is VERY difficult to master.
I for one belongs to the 2nd group of people ! I always have a problem to THANK others for the good things they do for me.
What causes this not-so-good attitude of mine I'm not very sure but it is INSIDE of me! It's in my gene ! Not the gene I was born with but something that been nurtured for many years......hence old habits die hard I guess !
Yet at the same time there is a tiny voice inside me which keep telling me that it is not right, I got to change, I must show my appreciation to others especially those who are kind/helpful to me......and especially those who are always there for me, those who love/care about me.....
So, what kind of appreciation are we talking about ? The most advance appreciation (Level 3) would be like giving something to the person, which can either be physical gifts (eg birthday present) or mental/spiritual (eg birthday wishes) to the other person.
Level 2 I suppose entails a simple 'thank you' or a tap on the shoulder of the person who had done you a favour/deed. A simple thing to do yet not many can do it naturally !
And the least you could do (Level 1) I suppose is to smile at that person. For instance, someone holds the lift's door for you, do you just ignore him/her as nothing had just happened or you say Thank You to him/her?
For me, I would normally say thank you and smile too....and with that I can say that I pass that Appreciation Test Level 1..... even this skill I learned during my stay in the UK....pass the salt, hold the door, greet Good Morning, notice a new haircut - just to name a few little little things which make the other person feels appreciated.
But when it comes to the higher level, Level 2 and 3 ........ the things which defines me as a person, I failed to perform. For example, why do I find it so difficult to thank my wife for all the things she does for me...like washing the clothes, cooking, ironing etc etc or even for loving me !
Am I a bad husband ? Who should be blame?
I cannot blame the environment I was brought up anymore for this failure because I have been an adult since I left my mom's house when I was 16 years old. And then on, whatever I absorbed as my culture and personalities are my own doing. Nurture is not at fault. I just didn't try hard enough to be a better person in this aspect.
The more important question is can I change?
Is it too late to start showing appreciation to others? Is it so difficult to start showing love to those who love me? Will it hurt me if I thank others who have done good things which contributes to my success?
The answer lies in my determination to change for the better. And from today onwards I promise myself to be more aware of this need to show due appreciation to those who deserve it !
A Caring & Loving Husband & Father I Am,
Amir Hamdzan Hamzah
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
# 29 - MIND Improvement - Hold On To Your DREAMS
....On Each & Every Day Of Your Life......and Persevere To Make It A Reality !
One common denominator of highly successful people is that they ALL have DREAMS. Their dreams is their # 1 motivator which drove them forward when they first started their venture, and their perverance in holding on to their dreams through high and low times is something which we can emulate if we too want to be successful !
All big things in this world started as a DREAM, translated into a DESIRE, transformed into ACTION and finally realised into ACHIEVEMENTS ! KLCC was a dream. Taj Mahal was a dream. Winning Thomas Cupo was a dream. But they all became reality for the dreamers who dare to dream a BIG DREAM!
Some people hate others who like to talk about dreams, especially when it involves BIG DREAMS !
One common denominator of highly successful people is that they ALL have DREAMS. Their dreams is their # 1 motivator which drove them forward when they first started their venture, and their perverance in holding on to their dreams through high and low times is something which we can emulate if we too want to be successful !
All big things in this world started as a DREAM, translated into a DESIRE, transformed into ACTION and finally realised into ACHIEVEMENTS ! KLCC was a dream. Taj Mahal was a dream. Winning Thomas Cupo was a dream. But they all became reality for the dreamers who dare to dream a BIG DREAM!
Some people hate others who like to talk about dreams, especially when it involves BIG DREAMS !
And where do we normally find people who like to mention about dreams? At MLM Seminars, at Insurance/Unit Trust training or BOPs, at Motivation courses and so on......I myself sometimes find those speakers a bit over-the-top when they try to implant some impossible dreams in our mind, as if everybody can achieve the same dreams !
Am I negative just like everybody else? Sometimes I am, I got to admit. But with hindsight, I think that I was wrong to think like that. For myself and other NEGATIVE people out there, people who think that others who talk about dreams are simply DREAMERS (Angan-Angan Mat Jenin) and nothing else, LET US THINK AGAIN!
"I'm afraid you (people who like to dream impossible dreams) have gone bonkers/mad, but you know what, all great people are!"...... just to borrow Alice's words when she comforted The Hatter in Alice in Wonderland the movie. So it's OK to be perceived as mad, so long as we end up being a GREAT MAN !
But why he hated the Dreamers so much? Maybe because our own previous experinces (mostly bad ones) had turned us to reject anybody else who try to show us how to dream - how to dream a better house, a better car, a better job, a better life ?
We were not born negative. In fact when were little, we too had beautiful dreams, just that we have forgotten about it....just like the boy who had lost his marbles and could not 'fly' anymore in Peter Pan's Story.
We were not born negative. In fact when were little, we too had beautiful dreams, just that we have forgotten about it....just like the boy who had lost his marbles and could not 'fly' anymore in Peter Pan's Story.
I too used to have my own dreams when I was a boy.....and now I've forgotten most of it.
But my 2nd son (Ammar) had reminded me of how important dream is and how I too had a dream once. Ammar himself has a very BIG DREAM which is so visionary and vivid, that I feel very much obliged to fullfill it....but forgive me my dear........please give me some time, coz at them moment your Abah really can't achieve it.......
But my 2nd son (Ammar) had reminded me of how important dream is and how I too had a dream once. Ammar himself has a very BIG DREAM which is so visionary and vivid, that I feel very much obliged to fullfill it....but forgive me my dear........please give me some time, coz at them moment your Abah really can't achieve it.......
And if Allah permits, I'll get it for you my son.....SOON.....SOON.....
signed,
Amir The Dreamer
Picture : Ammar's drawing of our Big House - with many stairs leading to the top floor, complete with furniture, 2 butterfly catcher on the roof, a garden and gardening tools, a car, a miniature aeroplane and a yacht on the background (maybe in a lake/sea).......
Monday, May 24, 2010
# 28 - MIND improvement - To Live & Die a Rich Man
It Is Our Right to Live & Die a RICH MAN !
I'm not trying to be a Human Rights proponent here when I say that it is our right to be rich!
That's not my intention at all. And I'm not going to use the Basic Human Rights argument just to make a point....
What I mean by our right is that, whatever we become today is a result of what we planned and envisioned long time ago. So, if today I'm not rich...that's my right!
I deserved it! I'm not rich because I'd NEVER, I repeat NEVER dreamed of being RICH ! It sounds silly, but that's TRUE. No shame in admitting that.
But now, things are about to change. Now I WANT TO BE RICH. Even better, I must say that I AM ALREADY RICH and I WANT TO BE RICHER !
I'm also already acting like I am rich, because You BE--> You DO--> You HAVE....... and not the other way round.....i.e don't wait until you HAVE something then you want to do and act like you already have it. When you're used to acting like you already own it, then one day YOU WILL OWN it ! Simple example, the car that I've been driving the last 7 years is not mine, it's still the bank's but I acted like it's mine. I take care of it, love it, treasure it, thus it's mine one day! And if I really need a smartphone, I should just get it first, and work like hell to pay for it ! Because if I keep on saying that I must save the money first, most likely I will never get it !
Therefore, to be rich, I must act like I'm already rich.
At this point in time, I must make it clear that the definition of RICH is very subjective. You can ask 100 different people and yet every single one of them will give a different definition of what they perceive as RICH. So it is a matter of perception.
In general, you define RICH in the form of material possessions, like the house you live in, the car you drive and the salary you bring home or the position you hold in a small/big organisation. And you normally give an example of a rich man you know in order to define RICH. For example you see the richest man in your kampung as rich, or the richest man in the country as rich.
Nothing is wrong with all the above definitions and examples, but they're not accurate ! Why? because once you see only the richest people as rich, you limit your own chance of being rich!
After doing some reading on How To Live & Die Rich....I can summarise it as follows :
De-fine - what YOU mean as RICH
Sa-ve - Spend only on Needs, not Wants
In-vest - Make $ works for you
D-egree - or education --> can earn more
H-ealth - look after yourself --> spend less
Ma-rry - 2 heads & pockets better than 1
ENJOY - yr life (that's the aim of being RICH)
So, who wants to be RICH like me? Come join my group.....I Want to Live & Die Rich...check it out at my FB...
signed,
Amir DeSa InDaH
I'm not trying to be a Human Rights proponent here when I say that it is our right to be rich!
That's not my intention at all. And I'm not going to use the Basic Human Rights argument just to make a point....
What I mean by our right is that, whatever we become today is a result of what we planned and envisioned long time ago. So, if today I'm not rich...that's my right!
I deserved it! I'm not rich because I'd NEVER, I repeat NEVER dreamed of being RICH ! It sounds silly, but that's TRUE. No shame in admitting that.
But now, things are about to change. Now I WANT TO BE RICH. Even better, I must say that I AM ALREADY RICH and I WANT TO BE RICHER !
I'm also already acting like I am rich, because You BE--> You DO--> You HAVE....... and not the other way round.....i.e don't wait until you HAVE something then you want to do and act like you already have it. When you're used to acting like you already own it, then one day YOU WILL OWN it ! Simple example, the car that I've been driving the last 7 years is not mine, it's still the bank's but I acted like it's mine. I take care of it, love it, treasure it, thus it's mine one day! And if I really need a smartphone, I should just get it first, and work like hell to pay for it ! Because if I keep on saying that I must save the money first, most likely I will never get it !
Therefore, to be rich, I must act like I'm already rich.
At this point in time, I must make it clear that the definition of RICH is very subjective. You can ask 100 different people and yet every single one of them will give a different definition of what they perceive as RICH. So it is a matter of perception.
In general, you define RICH in the form of material possessions, like the house you live in, the car you drive and the salary you bring home or the position you hold in a small/big organisation. And you normally give an example of a rich man you know in order to define RICH. For example you see the richest man in your kampung as rich, or the richest man in the country as rich.
Nothing is wrong with all the above definitions and examples, but they're not accurate ! Why? because once you see only the richest people as rich, you limit your own chance of being rich!
After doing some reading on How To Live & Die Rich....I can summarise it as follows :
De-fine - what YOU mean as RICH
Sa-ve - Spend only on Needs, not Wants
In-vest - Make $ works for you
D-egree - or education --> can earn more
H-ealth - look after yourself --> spend less
Ma-rry - 2 heads & pockets better than 1
ENJOY - yr life (that's the aim of being RICH)
So, who wants to be RICH like me? Come join my group.....I Want to Live & Die Rich...check it out at my FB...
signed,
Amir DeSa InDaH
Thursday, May 13, 2010
# 27 - SOCIAL Improvement - Treasure Your Friends & Memories !
Old Memories Are Very Sweet Eventhough The Memory Itself Was Bitter !
The past couple of weeks had been busy for me. Busy with getting reconnected with a group of long lost friends from my early childhood times in general. i.e specifically my primary school's era.
Mala, Epa, Zainia, Kamarulzaman, Marhani, Hasyimy, Zura....are some of the names which had contributed to my early childhood memories at SKS. And now after some 24 years later, these friends of mine have re-lighted my candles of memories by sharing their stories during those most memorable and most wonderful period in my childhood....
So how can those old stories improve my life TODAY?
For me those old memories are the only things which can hold us together as friends. And only those who appreciate friendships will know the importance of memories and the emotions attached to it (i.e. happy feelings) when our friends remember us for who we were....and be ready to accept us as who we are today.
And the most beautiful part is that, even though what our friends or we ourselves remember about us was bitter when we experienced it once upon a time ago, it still becomes a very Sweet Memory for us TODAY !!!!
For example....one friend reiterated his experience of being whacked with a rattan by a teacher due to his failure to memorise the Sifir (multiplication table) - which I also KENA ! I'm sure he didn't like it (so was I) when it happened then, but now we can tell the story in laughter and in good humour....The bad memory was an important event which turned us into humans as we are today !
Some people might not like to talk about the past so much because they say it will hinder them from moving forward. In a sense this kind of attitude is true but why do we have to take the negative part of an event when we can create many positive outcomes from it. It actually depends on our own creativity and intentions (NAWAITU).
For example, it's much easier to befriend a long lost friend compared to trying to befriend a total stranger! And this old friend of us can immediately become our best friend whilst a stranger will will take a few months or even years for us to become close to them.....
And why do we need friends or close friends?
Do I need to answer this question? I think everyone knows the answer...which generally are....to fulfill our socialisation needs, our spiritual needs or even to expand our business ! The more friends you have the more colourful your life will be.....and so on....
So, I'm very glad that my long lost friends are mainly very sporting, friendly and positive towards my attempt to rekindle our relationships. And let's hope the best for the future my dear friends.....Let us be friends FOREVER......
I LOVE YOU ALL, my dear friends.......no matter if you're from KSU, SKS, Maxwell, Alam Shah, KFC Pertama, IPM, Binary, PPPITM Subang, Tonbridge, EDU, UMIST, Maybank, HSBC, KKUM or any where our paths of life had crossed......
A Great Friend In The Making,
Amir Hamdzan
The past couple of weeks had been busy for me. Busy with getting reconnected with a group of long lost friends from my early childhood times in general. i.e specifically my primary school's era.
Mala, Epa, Zainia, Kamarulzaman, Marhani, Hasyimy, Zura....are some of the names which had contributed to my early childhood memories at SKS. And now after some 24 years later, these friends of mine have re-lighted my candles of memories by sharing their stories during those most memorable and most wonderful period in my childhood....
So how can those old stories improve my life TODAY?
For me those old memories are the only things which can hold us together as friends. And only those who appreciate friendships will know the importance of memories and the emotions attached to it (i.e. happy feelings) when our friends remember us for who we were....and be ready to accept us as who we are today.
And the most beautiful part is that, even though what our friends or we ourselves remember about us was bitter when we experienced it once upon a time ago, it still becomes a very Sweet Memory for us TODAY !!!!
For example....one friend reiterated his experience of being whacked with a rattan by a teacher due to his failure to memorise the Sifir (multiplication table) - which I also KENA ! I'm sure he didn't like it (so was I) when it happened then, but now we can tell the story in laughter and in good humour....The bad memory was an important event which turned us into humans as we are today !
Some people might not like to talk about the past so much because they say it will hinder them from moving forward. In a sense this kind of attitude is true but why do we have to take the negative part of an event when we can create many positive outcomes from it. It actually depends on our own creativity and intentions (NAWAITU).
For example, it's much easier to befriend a long lost friend compared to trying to befriend a total stranger! And this old friend of us can immediately become our best friend whilst a stranger will will take a few months or even years for us to become close to them.....
And why do we need friends or close friends?
Do I need to answer this question? I think everyone knows the answer...which generally are....to fulfill our socialisation needs, our spiritual needs or even to expand our business ! The more friends you have the more colourful your life will be.....and so on....
So, I'm very glad that my long lost friends are mainly very sporting, friendly and positive towards my attempt to rekindle our relationships. And let's hope the best for the future my dear friends.....Let us be friends FOREVER......
I LOVE YOU ALL, my dear friends.......no matter if you're from KSU, SKS, Maxwell, Alam Shah, KFC Pertama, IPM, Binary, PPPITM Subang, Tonbridge, EDU, UMIST, Maybank, HSBC, KKUM or any where our paths of life had crossed......
I want to be Your Close Friend, Do You?
A Great Friend In The Making,
Amir Hamdzan
Monday, May 3, 2010
# 26 - PARENTING improvement - Teach Kids To Save Money
And Before You Teach, You Must D-I-Y !
Whatever we want other people to do, most of the times we MUST do it ourselves first !
So in our attempt to teach our kids to save money, we must first of all save money for them, since the day our children were born ! It doesn't have to be a lot.....a mere RM 1 per day would be sufficient. In fact, anybody and I mean ANYBODY (rich and poor) should be able to save at least RM 1 per day for the future of their children.
So, from the first day of your child for example,
On his/her 1st birthday, your contribution = RM 365.00
Money from friends/families (BabyGifts) = RM 320.00
Collection during Hari Raya open houses = RM 315.00
-------------------------
TOTAL = RM 1,000.00
==================
Therefore, after 1 year your baby should have at least RM 1k in his/her account. That's the ideal situation, for parents who are forward-looking and have the discipline to save RM 1/day for their children's future !
In my own case, I always had the vision to save certain amount of money for my children but never had the discipline to do it ! And most of the time I was just planning to save, but never did it !
The sad thing is I KNEW it was important to save for my children. And I KNEW a better way to save, better than putting away RM 1/day in a Tabung, but I didn't do it !
Why that happened? Partly because of life's dificulties and hardships (excuses!!!!)
And partly because I tried to do everything alone. I never get my wife and kids involved in what I was trying to do, thus it was doomed to fail since it first started. For example, I did try to save RM 1/day for my first kid, but it failed halfway. The monies never reached the bank !
So, after learning from all the mistakes and in the spirit of continuous improvement, it's time to make things right in this area of SAVINGS FOR THE FUTURE !
This time around :
i) I involve my wife and my kids - let the wife know and get the kids to start savings money in a nice Tabung (bought from the souvenir shop, i.e investment this is!)
ii) I took the kids along, together with their Tabungs, straight to the bank with what we have - and Maybank's Yippie is the answer
iii) And next week I'll start a new way to ensure their future (will talk about this later).
So, till next week...BYE !
Whatever we want other people to do, most of the times we MUST do it ourselves first !
So in our attempt to teach our kids to save money, we must first of all save money for them, since the day our children were born ! It doesn't have to be a lot.....a mere RM 1 per day would be sufficient. In fact, anybody and I mean ANYBODY (rich and poor) should be able to save at least RM 1 per day for the future of their children.
So, from the first day of your child for example,
On his/her 1st birthday, your contribution = RM 365.00
Money from friends/families (BabyGifts) = RM 320.00
Collection during Hari Raya open houses = RM 315.00
-------------------------
TOTAL = RM 1,000.00
==================
Therefore, after 1 year your baby should have at least RM 1k in his/her account. That's the ideal situation, for parents who are forward-looking and have the discipline to save RM 1/day for their children's future !
In my own case, I always had the vision to save certain amount of money for my children but never had the discipline to do it ! And most of the time I was just planning to save, but never did it !
The sad thing is I KNEW it was important to save for my children. And I KNEW a better way to save, better than putting away RM 1/day in a Tabung, but I didn't do it !
Why that happened? Partly because of life's dificulties and hardships (excuses!!!!)
And partly because I tried to do everything alone. I never get my wife and kids involved in what I was trying to do, thus it was doomed to fail since it first started. For example, I did try to save RM 1/day for my first kid, but it failed halfway. The monies never reached the bank !
So, after learning from all the mistakes and in the spirit of continuous improvement, it's time to make things right in this area of SAVINGS FOR THE FUTURE !
This time around :
i) I involve my wife and my kids - let the wife know and get the kids to start savings money in a nice Tabung (bought from the souvenir shop, i.e investment this is!)
ii) I took the kids along, together with their Tabungs, straight to the bank with what we have - and Maybank's Yippie is the answer
iii) And next week I'll start a new way to ensure their future (will talk about this later).
So, till next week...BYE !
Thursday, April 22, 2010
# 25 - FINANCIAL improvement - Protect Yourself First !
No One Plan To Fail But Many Fail To Plan
My main topic is about Protection and the sub-topic is about Planning. Let's talk about the subject of PLANNING first.
Planning means to be able to predict where you want to be in the future and by when and to think of ways how to get there! in a nutshell, if you're bad at planning, the chance are you're going to fail in life !
Planning is something I've been very good at.
At Maxwell I planned my study very well (despite coming from a very poor family) so that I could go to a boarding school with the ultimate aim TO HELP MY FAMILY. My plan worked to perfection when I got offered to study at MRSM Kuantan and Alam Shah (SAS) KL. I chose SAS.
Then at SAS I planned to make full use of me being there because I wanted so much to follow the footstep of my cousin (Abang Azhar) who had further his studies in the USA. I was active in co-curriculum and the height of my achievement was when our team won the PPM Debate (BM), in which my teammates agreed to a strategy which I had planned for the team in the first round !
Last but not least at SAS I continued to plan my studies and executed it very well until I came up as Top 5 student in SPM 1991 and secured a scholarship to fly to the UK !
I planned to be an accountant. But my plan FAILED ! JPA was not going to offer me do to accounting, for some strange reasons. So I had to accept the offer to do business studies instead. That was the point when I learned to adapt. I accepted that we don't always get what we planned for.
With a Business Degree in hand, I landed my first job at Maybank Credit Card Centre in 1997 (some 13 years ago !) as a Marketing Planning Officer. Observe the word in italic, P.L.A.N.N.I.N.G !
I was placed there because in the Placement Test (Essay Form) which all officers had to take, I wrote about My Master Plan. i.e. what I want to be and by when ! It all came to me in a flash, while writing the essay, when I happened to find a brochure about Career Path in Maybank.....
I excelled and loved that Maybank job. However due to a better offer (pay-wise), I had to leave. I worked in Maybank for 3 months only, yet there was a Farewell Party for me !
From then on my life had been a roller coaster ride ! There were many ups and downs. Mostly downs. But WHY ? Because I failed to plan. I did not plan to fail but I basically failed to plan. Most of the times I had lost my Planning Skill !!!!!
It was a rough ride for me and only these last few years that I started to recover my true self and my life back. After some long Self-Assessment (Muhasabah Diri) and Soul Searching....I concluded that Planning was one of my greatest strength and I must start doing it again..... Maybe it's a bit late but I hope it's not too late for me to start all over again. And the key for me to rebound is PLANNING !
Two years ago I had planned for most of the things I accomplished today. And now is the time to review and fine-tune that PLAN to achieve better things in my life.
And this week my first priority in my planning was to realise my planning from 2 years ago - i.e to PROTECT MYSELF as the head of my family against life's uncertainties.
In layman's terms, only this week I had managed to buy my Life Insurance + Medical Card + Savings ! Not that I never bought insurance before but life's hardships had forced to lapse the premiums and hence lose valuable time (because we pay higher premium as we get older). In fact I had put my family in danger by not protecting myself .
I'm proud to say that I've bought insurance from the best, i.e Prudential. And with the Medical Card, I feel more confident with my life because I know if something happens to me, I 'm covered and I won't trouble my family !
So that was my best improvement for this week and next week I intend to embark on a better improvement quest.....i.e I'm pondering a change in career path.....still in the line of Sales, but a much better and more meaningful Sales Job than the one I'm currently doing.....
So, till next week.....
Bye !
Amir Hamdzan
Friday, April 16, 2010
# 24 - TIME Improvement - STOP Wasting Time !
To Waste is To Befriend The Satan !
Harsh it may sound the above phrases, but that's what we Muslim believe !
And that' what my Quran teacher (Makcik Limah) sometimes told me & my friends every Thursday Night some 25 years ago when we had our Pot Luck feast after our Quran Recital Class...."Do not Waste Food or else You'll be The Devils' Friend"......something like that....
And that's exactly what I'm telling my kids...trying to instill good habits within them.....i.e. NOT TO WASTE anything....not to waste food, time, electricity, A4 paper, colour pencils, erasers, water etc etc....
Is it working? Are my kids listening to me? I don't think it's working yet because I can still see them wasting most of the things I mentioned above. Maybe because those things are ABUNDANT and easy to come by......in short they've become UNGRATEFUL....they take things for granted !
I always tell them stories of my hardships when I was a kid, and ask them to be thankful for what they are having right now. However my stories seem not to leave much effects on them because they don't seem to be able to imagine a family with no rice to eat, a boy with no books 1 month before a major exam, a bathroom with no tap water and a house without electricity ! It's just a fairy tale to them.....because they were born into this perfect and ready-with-everything world !
This situation where my kids are wasting things really makes me feel sad. BUT I'm not giving up on them just yet. I'll never stop educating and telling them to appreciate what they have !
This by itself I consider a big improvement in my own mental attitude and the day when my kids realise the importance of NOT WASTING things will be D-day as my GREAT IMPROVEMENT DAY !
So you may ask "What's ALL this story about your kids wasting things got to do with your topic today?".
My answer is this.....it is human nature to see other people's weakness and shortcomings whilst ignoring the fact that they might have the same bad attitude !
In this example, I must admit that I sometimes have the same attitude. Maybe not much towards food and other material things but mostly towards wasting time !
Every one of us is granted 24 hrs per day by God. No one is given more hour than the other ! So precious time is, that if God decides to take it away from you means that you have it no more ! Even then not may of us seems to appreciate the short and so little time they have on this earth !
I just realised that I waste too much, way too much time...
- on watching the TV (the remote control is like being glued to my hand!)
- on the internet (FB in particular - this one I'm taking a BIG STEP to overcome!),
- on doing petty/unimportant things (like reading Junk Mails),
- on chatting away about unimportant topics (be it online or offline),
- on daydreaming (about various things)
- etc etc etc
So my biggest improvement for this week is to realise the time I have wasted and my aspiration to make full use of the balance of my uknown time left on this world.....and the best way to do that is to LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST (borrowing Great Eastern's tagline) and to LIVE LIKE YOU'RE GONNA DIE TOMORROW !..........and my biggest step this week is to STOP using FB during the weekdays and to use only a couple of hours in the weekends ! The times saved from this activity will be used to do more work, to spend more time with my family and to LIVE LIFE ! Yeeehaaaa!
So that's all for today......Keep Improving My Friends ! Include Me In Your Improvement Quest If You Have One Coz I'll Surely Support You ! Let's Make this World A Better Place For You And Me And The Entire Human Race !
Sincerely,
Amir Hamdzan
Our First Rented House (2004) .....small, hot & stuffy, but we were grateful !
Harsh it may sound the above phrases, but that's what we Muslim believe !
And that' what my Quran teacher (Makcik Limah) sometimes told me & my friends every Thursday Night some 25 years ago when we had our Pot Luck feast after our Quran Recital Class...."Do not Waste Food or else You'll be The Devils' Friend"......something like that....
And that's exactly what I'm telling my kids...trying to instill good habits within them.....i.e. NOT TO WASTE anything....not to waste food, time, electricity, A4 paper, colour pencils, erasers, water etc etc....
Is it working? Are my kids listening to me? I don't think it's working yet because I can still see them wasting most of the things I mentioned above. Maybe because those things are ABUNDANT and easy to come by......in short they've become UNGRATEFUL....they take things for granted !
I always tell them stories of my hardships when I was a kid, and ask them to be thankful for what they are having right now. However my stories seem not to leave much effects on them because they don't seem to be able to imagine a family with no rice to eat, a boy with no books 1 month before a major exam, a bathroom with no tap water and a house without electricity ! It's just a fairy tale to them.....because they were born into this perfect and ready-with-everything world !
This situation where my kids are wasting things really makes me feel sad. BUT I'm not giving up on them just yet. I'll never stop educating and telling them to appreciate what they have !
This by itself I consider a big improvement in my own mental attitude and the day when my kids realise the importance of NOT WASTING things will be D-day as my GREAT IMPROVEMENT DAY !
So you may ask "What's ALL this story about your kids wasting things got to do with your topic today?".
My answer is this.....it is human nature to see other people's weakness and shortcomings whilst ignoring the fact that they might have the same bad attitude !
In this example, I must admit that I sometimes have the same attitude. Maybe not much towards food and other material things but mostly towards wasting time !
Every one of us is granted 24 hrs per day by God. No one is given more hour than the other ! So precious time is, that if God decides to take it away from you means that you have it no more ! Even then not may of us seems to appreciate the short and so little time they have on this earth !
I just realised that I waste too much, way too much time...
- on watching the TV (the remote control is like being glued to my hand!)
- on the internet (FB in particular - this one I'm taking a BIG STEP to overcome!),
- on doing petty/unimportant things (like reading Junk Mails),
- on chatting away about unimportant topics (be it online or offline),
- on daydreaming (about various things)
- etc etc etc
So my biggest improvement for this week is to realise the time I have wasted and my aspiration to make full use of the balance of my uknown time left on this world.....and the best way to do that is to LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST (borrowing Great Eastern's tagline) and to LIVE LIKE YOU'RE GONNA DIE TOMORROW !..........and my biggest step this week is to STOP using FB during the weekdays and to use only a couple of hours in the weekends ! The times saved from this activity will be used to do more work, to spend more time with my family and to LIVE LIFE ! Yeeehaaaa!
So that's all for today......Keep Improving My Friends ! Include Me In Your Improvement Quest If You Have One Coz I'll Surely Support You ! Let's Make this World A Better Place For You And Me And The Entire Human Race !
Sincerely,
Amir Hamdzan
Our First Rented House (2004) .....small, hot & stuffy, but we were grateful !
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
# 23 - SOCIAL improvement - Show Some Love
Treat OTHERS The Way YOU want to be treated
How many times have we heard the expression above? More than 10 times I guess. But have we given serious consideration to its true meaning or not? Let's ponder......
Although the expression has a very deep and important meaning, how many of us really practice it? How many of us show our love to our family members the way we want them to love us? How often we tell our loved ones that we L.O.V.E them??????
How about at work, do we offer help to colleagues as we would like them to help us? Have you ever felt like being left out just because your friends do not include you in a conversation or a lunch trip?
Those (family & friends) are the people we know or love. Even them we sometimes failed to treat nicely, how about total strangers, such as people we ride the LRT together, people who queue in line with us at the bank, people who serve us food at KFC, those who gives us their service at the banks, and many more people....Well, too many people we need to consider taking care of their feeling that any real attempt to do so is futile !
What I mean by futile is when we TRY to be nice to everybody. My point is that we SHOULDN'T TRY to be nice to everyone ! We should be NICE naturally, that's the answer. Don't try because once we try, we may fail. If we just put ourselves in their shoes and treat them the way we want to be treated all the times, then we should be fine.
Now let's hold that thought about being nice NATURALLY to strangers, and let's get back to our beloved ones. Because they're even more important in our short life on this world.
As for our family, I sincerely believe that we MUST TRY VERY VERY VERY hard to be nice to them, because if we don't try then we'll never do it and we'll never be nice to them.
Why is family & friends different from strangers? Simply because Love Starts At Home. If you're caring at home, you'll carry the same attitude outside, don't you think so !
For example, if you want your kid to study instead of playing games...imagine you are your own kid, how would you like to be told? Would you like to be shouted at or be whispered in a soft and smooth voices to your small ears? .......you just imagine you are them........you'll know which one's you'll listen and internalise forever !!!!
I for one is practising soft approach to my kids as opposed to the hard approach I used to practise and I'm seeing some positive results both to my kids and myself.....they tend to listen better to my instructions/requests and I tend to be more loving towards them !
What's your opinions my friends?
How many times have we heard the expression above? More than 10 times I guess. But have we given serious consideration to its true meaning or not? Let's ponder......
Although the expression has a very deep and important meaning, how many of us really practice it? How many of us show our love to our family members the way we want them to love us? How often we tell our loved ones that we L.O.V.E them??????
How about at work, do we offer help to colleagues as we would like them to help us? Have you ever felt like being left out just because your friends do not include you in a conversation or a lunch trip?
Those (family & friends) are the people we know or love. Even them we sometimes failed to treat nicely, how about total strangers, such as people we ride the LRT together, people who queue in line with us at the bank, people who serve us food at KFC, those who gives us their service at the banks, and many more people....Well, too many people we need to consider taking care of their feeling that any real attempt to do so is futile !
What I mean by futile is when we TRY to be nice to everybody. My point is that we SHOULDN'T TRY to be nice to everyone ! We should be NICE naturally, that's the answer. Don't try because once we try, we may fail. If we just put ourselves in their shoes and treat them the way we want to be treated all the times, then we should be fine.
Now let's hold that thought about being nice NATURALLY to strangers, and let's get back to our beloved ones. Because they're even more important in our short life on this world.
As for our family, I sincerely believe that we MUST TRY VERY VERY VERY hard to be nice to them, because if we don't try then we'll never do it and we'll never be nice to them.
Why is family & friends different from strangers? Simply because Love Starts At Home. If you're caring at home, you'll carry the same attitude outside, don't you think so !
For example, if you want your kid to study instead of playing games...imagine you are your own kid, how would you like to be told? Would you like to be shouted at or be whispered in a soft and smooth voices to your small ears? .......you just imagine you are them........you'll know which one's you'll listen and internalise forever !!!!
I for one is practising soft approach to my kids as opposed to the hard approach I used to practise and I'm seeing some positive results both to my kids and myself.....they tend to listen better to my instructions/requests and I tend to be more loving towards them !
What's your opinions my friends?
Sincerely Improving Every Day, For Self, For Family & For The Mankind
AMIR HAMDZAN HAMZAH
Friday, April 2, 2010
# 22 - OVERALL improvement - Challennnnnnnge !!!!
Your Greatest Enemy Is YOU !!!
It was Sept'09 the last time I wrote in this Blog, with the aim to improve on my aquarium, i.e. to make it better/cleaner/brighter !!! - the sad thing is that the aquarium has never been touched, let alone being cleaned ever since !
An even sadder reality is, that last entry was about 6 MONTHS ago !!! Wow ! Time really flies and it has left me behind. Leaving me wondering what went wrong ?
The intention was good - to improve on my life. The momentum was also good - I managed to write some decent entries and I had BIG plans ahead. Then somehow it stopped. Procrastination started to take over, leading me towards my old self.....futher confirming that OLD HABITS die really really hard !
I've been meaning to KICK START a new me, but never succeeded. And who or what to blame?
Well, I can blame many people or things....but one thing I remember from my CIMBWA days is NOT TO BLAME OTHERS because if you point 1 finger to others, you're pointing the other 3 back to yourself !!!
And the single most important thing I learn from Mahadi BZ at CIMBWA was this mantera -"CHALLENNNNNNGE !!!!!" - which is uttered in such a powerful way, starting with holding your fisted right hand up, shake it to and fro and shout it aloud, very loud, whenever you face an obstacle and insya'Allah you'll be more determined to face it head-on! (Kudos and Credit to Mahadi BZ and The Milionnaire Sisters !)
My true enemy has been MYSELF all along. And I'm not ashame to admit that. In fact I believe that this confession will make be a better/stronger person in pursuing my quest for a better life for my family.
So HERE comes the new me, re-energised and fully recharged !
Improvement Is the Key !
Amir Hamdzan
It was Sept'09 the last time I wrote in this Blog, with the aim to improve on my aquarium, i.e. to make it better/cleaner/brighter !!! - the sad thing is that the aquarium has never been touched, let alone being cleaned ever since !
An even sadder reality is, that last entry was about 6 MONTHS ago !!! Wow ! Time really flies and it has left me behind. Leaving me wondering what went wrong ?
The intention was good - to improve on my life. The momentum was also good - I managed to write some decent entries and I had BIG plans ahead. Then somehow it stopped. Procrastination started to take over, leading me towards my old self.....futher confirming that OLD HABITS die really really hard !
I've been meaning to KICK START a new me, but never succeeded. And who or what to blame?
Well, I can blame many people or things....but one thing I remember from my CIMBWA days is NOT TO BLAME OTHERS because if you point 1 finger to others, you're pointing the other 3 back to yourself !!!
And the single most important thing I learn from Mahadi BZ at CIMBWA was this mantera -"CHALLENNNNNNGE !!!!!" - which is uttered in such a powerful way, starting with holding your fisted right hand up, shake it to and fro and shout it aloud, very loud, whenever you face an obstacle and insya'Allah you'll be more determined to face it head-on! (Kudos and Credit to Mahadi BZ and The Milionnaire Sisters !)
My true enemy has been MYSELF all along. And I'm not ashame to admit that. In fact I believe that this confession will make be a better/stronger person in pursuing my quest for a better life for my family.
So HERE comes the new me, re-energised and fully recharged !
Improvement Is the Key !
Amir Hamdzan
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